Well, I think I am a little better today, although I could not quit coughing long enough last night to get any significant sleep. Have been able to get a couple of hours here and there today. I just can't seem to get this cough to break up. So...we contine the breathing treatments. As I said yesterday, I had been asked to speak on a panel at our Ladies Retreat today. The title of the retreat is "Got Dreams? Embracing God's Dreams for you. I will reflect on some of the questions here. Mostly for my own sake, but hopefully some of my experiences might help you draw closer to God and glorify Him. That would be my prayer.

Question 1: Describe your dream that has turned out differently than you had hoped or imagined.
This was going to be the hardest of the questions for me because it seems in my life God has been a God of surprises and for the most part has detoured me from numerous dreams to see his ideal for me. Here are just a few of the dreams:
1. Wanted a baby sister
2. Wanted a father who would journey with us in our Christian walk
3. Wanted a Christian husband
4. Wanted to work for Christian Children's Home as a Social Worker
5. Wanted to open a small group home for girls
6. Wanted children
7. Wanted to be a full time paid Children's Minister
8. Wanted to be healed from cervical cancer
9. Wanted bone in my leg to heal.

Obviously way too many dreams to comment on. So I am going to choose #2 and #3 because they are related.

Question 2: How has this dream changed? What does it look like in today's reality?
When I was 12 my parents got divorced, never what a child bargains for. The reasons for their divorce are not relevant to this post, but the fact that my birth father did not share our Christian beliefs did impact that decision. Three years later my mother remarried and God gave six children (me and my two brothers, my two stepsisters and stepbrothers) a wondeful God fearing father. And with a big sense of humor we were 16,15,15,14,13 and 6!! I didn't have long to live in that home before I went off to college, but because of my parents committment to the Lord we all became a family. My dad went on to study ministry and became a preacher for over 15 years. Full of wisdom and love for the Lord he loved me unconditionally. What I learned about God's love through Him could fill a book! Most of all is that even though I am not of his blood he loves me as though I am. I have never felt like a step child, I am his daughter in every way. I was determined that I was going to find a husband like him who loved God the way he did and would love me the way he loved my mom. I was engaged twice before I met Steve trying not to wait for God's best but to settle just to be married. Fortunately, things happened and those marriages did not come to be. Just when I thought God was not going to bring me a husband and I would have to accept that relationship with Him alone is always enough, He brought Steve into my life. We were both 36 at the time! That whole story is a book too, but suffice it to say Steve is the most wonderful Godly husband any woman could have!! Talk about loving unconditionally! He accepted so much from my past that he did not have to accept, he loved me even with all my weight, he continues to love me and forgive me when I don't have a loving spirit or my spirit is too critical. He has been the spiritual leader that I had longed for. He keeps my eyes focused on the prize. He prays for me and with me. He is so much better at the spiritual disciplines than I am that he challenges me in that area. Then these last two years!!!! What can I say about the countless hours he has spent serving my every whim, taking such good care of me! Loving me, encouraging me, giving me the courage to keep fighting. I love him more than I ever thought possible! I have all confidence that he will always do his best to keep his vows to me, one of which was to keep Ephesians 5:25 and love me the way Christ loved the church.

Question 3: What was the hardest part in adjusting to the reality in contrast to your dream?
Having the patience to wait on God's timing. I wanted to take matters in my own hands and do it my way. When I surrendered to God's way and timing He gave me the very best.

Question 4: Is there a particular scripture or spiritual concept you could share that God has given you that has helped? Jeremiah 29:11-For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Knowing God has the plan releases my need to control. The fullfillment of that plan has led me to the scripture I have at the head of my blog. God's promise-Ephesians 3:20-21-God can do anything, you know—far more than you could ever imagine or guess or request in your wildest dreams! He does it not by pushing us around but by working within us, his Spirit deeply and gently within us."(the Message)

Question 5: What is the biggest blessing you’ve experienced through the changed reality of your life dreams? That God's best is always much more than anything I could dream up on my own.

Question 6: Is there a benefit/blessing you have gained, the discovery of which would make you say that it has been worth the pain and/or the struggle? It make take some hindsight to see it, but to see God's plans will far exceed my own plans or ideas. There are definitely some other dreams which have yet to come true that I constantly have to remind myself of this truth. Perhaps I will share one or two of them in the days to come.